Family Love

   I am completely obsessed with pictures of my girls.. I feel like I can't get enough pictures of them. I just know how fast they grow up and I want to remember every single moment of their lives and no better way then to look back at pictures! I am creating photo albums online like I do every year, and I officially have 2,000 pictures in this one from this year! I can't choose what pictures I want to add so I just keep adding them!! I initially didn't want family pictures this year because of my "baby weight" I still have to lose, but decided to do it anyway, and I am so happy and thankful I did. Travis brought up such a good but sad point the other day. He said "Someday you and I will be gone, and Kennedy and Harper will only have memories and pictures to look back on." After the painful feeling went away of realizing he is right, someday we will be gone and not with our girls, I want them to have something to look back on. I know they will grow up knowing how much they are loved, but I want them to always have something to look back at and cherish. I also want to be able to look back and not miss one detail of their lives. They will only be this age once and it seems time is flying by. I guess I am very sentimental when it comes to my family and my plan is to document their entire lives or at least try :) Anyone who knows me knows how much I love pictures!

  Michelle came up with the fabulous theme for our photoshoot. I wanted something that was "vintage" she did an amazing job. Her passion for photography really shows in her pictures. Thank you for doing such a wonderful job!! They will be cherished by our family forever.

Thankful and Loved

  I  have been trying to slow down the last few days and cherish each and every second with my two precious angels. It seems like life gets so busy and goes by so fast, that it is so easy to get caught up in the little things and in life... If I could freeze this time with them I would. I never want to forget one memory, one funny thing that they do or say, or one minute of their lives. I know this time will slip by us fast so I am trying to not let the small things that have happened or may happen worry me and focus and the much bigger picture of the here and now. I often think about what college they might go to, what career they might want to have, hoping that one day they will grow up and find great husbands who love and cherish them as much as Trav cherishes me, but for now I want them to stay this age forever... I sit here trying to describe my love  for them, the feelings I have I cannot even write them down because I can't describe them in words.... Here is my best shot....

  Kennedy is now 2 1/2 and she really has the most outgoing and beautiful spirit. She loves to love, she is slightly stubborn,persistent, she never wants to disappoint you, you can see her soaking up each and every word we say and every action we do, she is curious, respectful, playful, caring, she is one of the smartest kids I have ever met. Everyone who comes in contact with her falls in love with her. She always knows what her sister "needs". She put her arms around me last night and said "Mama you are so beautiful and I love you so much" it instantly brought tears to my eyes. The whole world stopped for a what seemed like an eternity (I am sure it was only a few moments), because all that mattered at that second  was to sit on her bedroom floor with her in my lap  (tears running down my face) and hug her, and tell her how much I loved her back.This little girl will never know how much she is loved.

  Harper is 2 months old now and has filled just as big of a space in my heart as Kennedy. I always thought that it wouldn't be possible and I couldn't possibly love another little girl like I did Kennedy.. but I do! She loves to cuddle and be cuddled. She has the most beautiful piercing blue eyes (and Kennedy too), she does purposeful smiles at me and it melts my heart.. I  often find myself thinking what will she be like when she is older.. Is she going to be like her sister? I love the way when I kiss her on the nose my lips fit perfectly on the bridge of her nose (just like her sister) I love to cuddle her and smell her "new baby" smell. When she looks at you she smiles and studies you.  I love how she wraps her tiny little hand around my finger. I am in love....

  I want my daughters to grow up radiating love, honesty, gratefulness, compassion, kindness, confidence, forgiveness, to have a thankful heart, and a love for God and for life. I want them to know how much they are truly loved by their parents. I have to ask myself am I emulating those things (they are watching every move Trav and I make) that I want them to be? Its something I strive for everyday... I want them to know that they always have parents here for them no matter what. I never want them to feel a sad day in their lives. I will protect them to the ends of the earth. I want them to know how so very thankful I am to have them in my life.

  I am not sure what I have done to deserve the life that I have... I have been through happiness, heartbreak, sadness, hard lessons, and mistakes, but I cannot describe how thankful I am to be where I have ended up. I guess each lesson (happy or sad) I have learned in my life has made me who I am today. I have a great husband who loves me unconditionally, he is an amazing father to Kennedy and Harper, he goes out of his way to make sure I am happy, he is kind and has am amazing heart, and I know he will always be there for me no matter what. I have two perfect little girls who are happy, healthy, and growing perfectly. I have the greatest friends that anyone could hope for.. I have a great career that I worked insanely hard for... But my most important job to me at the end of the day is to be a good wife and mom to my children. To raise our children right and in love.We only have one chance to raise them ... As small as the girls are now I feel like I learn important lessons from them daily in love, kindness, forgiveness, compassion, and how to slow down and appreciate and enjoy the here and now.... God knows exactly who to place in your life when he does... I am so THANKFUL and LOVED.

Harper's Grand Entrance

After a long awaited 9 months Harper Abigail is finally here ( 7#15 ounces and 19 inches long).. It seems like the months went slowly and the days leading up to my C-Section flew by. I was so excited to meet this little princess and so nervous at the same time for surgery again.. My good friend Michelle Anderson of Mango Mahalo Photography agreed to do birth pictures for me. After clearing it with my OB, Anesthesia, and the Nursing Manager of L&D everyone agreed it was ok for her to go into the OR and do them!! I was so nervous that Harper would come before the "planned" day and I would miss out on these pics. When Michelle gave me the pics and slideshow yesterday I never knew I could get so emotional. I missed out on seeing the birth of both of my sweet girls because of having to have C-Sections. I am pretty sure that is the hardest I have cried in a while and didn't dare look at Travis or Michelle after the slideshow because I am pretty sure I would have cried even harder.. They were tears of pure joy and love for this little girl we brought into the world. There are no words to describe how extremely thankful I am for these pictures. They are priceless to me. It was even more special that Michelle got to share in this time together with us. I may even saw a tear or two from her :) It was so hard to choose between the 200+ pics but here are a few of my favorite!

Anticipation.....

Well I am officially very close to my C-Section date for the arrival of our 2nd sweet little princess Harper! I am very excited for her arrival and terrified at the same time. The anticipation is killing me!! What will Harper look like and what kind of demeanor will she have?  I cannot wait to hold my sweet girl in my arms, but not looking so forward to another surgery (prob because I know each little thing they are doing lol)! This pregnancy has been rough on me no doubt.... The pelvic instability being the worst hurting every time I move, now that I am so close to having my sweet girl all the month's of pain seem so worth it!! It brings back so many memories from Kennedy's birth. I look at my little girl who is now 2 1/2 and wonder where the time went. She is the most pure, amazing, smartest little person with the biggest personality! There is no way that I could love her anymore than I already do! She truly is my sunshine. I often pray and wonder how I will share the love I have in my heart for Kennedy with another little one.. I want our girls to grow up and never feel a sad day in their life, and I want them both to grow in the love and light of God! I know now and have known since Kennedy's arrival that a mother's love is something that really can never be described! There isn't one thing in this world I wouldn't do or one place I wouldn't go for my girls. I want them to look back when they are grown and know how much they were cherished and loved! I often look at Kennedy and wonder what type of sister she will grow up to be to Harper (a bossy one no doubt). I wonder how Kennedy will respond to Harper, a little unsure at first then I think her little motherly instincts will settle right in :)  I am excited for Kennedy to have someone to share her life with and a little sad that Kennedy will not be getting all of our attention anymore. Trav and I couldn't feel more blessed! We thank God everyday for our life and our girls! Our family is so close to complete <3

 My children are blessed and will be mighty in the land. Psalm 112:2
 For this child we have prayed, and the Lord has granted the desires of our hearts. 1 Samuel 1:27

Kennedy and Eli (+ 2 more on the way)

These two have grown up so fast! I remember when my sister-in-law Inga and I were pregnant with these two cuties! Time really does pass us by so quickly.. I enjoy every single second I get to hold my sweet girl (and my nephew) in my arms! Eli is constantly on the move (usually following K around) They had a blast spending the day together. Inga and I decided to try and get a few pics of Eli and K together before Harper and Gavin arrive in 3 weeks (We are having our C-Sections 4 days apart!) Before Eli arrived Trav set up the backdrop for me and I got to sneak in a few pics of Kennedy.. She has SUCH an amazing and animated personality and I feel like each of these pics show it... She will sit, pose, and smile for mini M&M's. When Eli arrived our idea was NOT so easily done... Between 2 little ones running around, Eli not wanting Kennedy to touch him, and all Kennedy wanting to do was hug and kiss him and boss him around, and 2 VERY pregnant girls trying to assemble this photo-shoot was very trying!! Eli was falling off the chair and Kennedy fell backwards and the whole backdrop fell down, but at the end of the day I am happy with the pics we got. One of them both looking at the camera smiling would have been nice too! Both of their little lives are about to change as they know it!